But it’s a nice try. when i open a story, i tend to look at the scroll bar for a quick reference to see how long it is before i read it. Mature sex you just need to be more descriptive with the actual sex. But it’s a nice try. good start though. 10 comments«12»anonymous readerReport 2013-10-28 09:13:31I agree it dose has potenial a lot indeed the locatipn is a bit hard to imagine but keep going my love.anonymous readerReport 2013-03-14 19:26:13i like when he said put your hand in your clit while i fuck u bitchanonymous readerReport 2013-01-31 19:44:21It has potential, though you weren’t very descriptive in your language. good start though. It would be nice if you could give the story a kind of “natural flow”. also, a character description lets people picture
